Cleveland, OH – Perennial All-Pro offensive tackle Joe Thomas shocked fans Monday when he admitted during an ESPN interview that he sometimes thinks about other quarterbacks when blocking for whoever is playing quarterback for the Browns that week. “I love the Browns organization and the people of Cleveland,” Thomas explained. “They’ve taken good care of me for 11 years. But sometimes you can’t help but imagine what it would be like to block for a quarterback with real skills, real endurance, and some serious enthusiasm. A guy with tighter, more taut throws. I’m talking about a real thoroughbred.”

Thomas, who has spent his Hall of Fame career protecting 19 different abysmal Browns’ quarterbacks with the utmost dignity and professionalism, candidly reflected upon what could have been: “It’s been such a carousel of shallow meaningless relationships,” he confessed. “Sometimes you just need the fantasy of stability to spice things up and get the juices flowing so you can get the job done. I won’t lie: At least 80% of the snaps last year I was picturing Tom Brady or Aaron Rodgers Behind me. Once in a while I’d do Cam Newton… just for variety’s sake.”