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Joe Thomas Admits He’s Never Learned The Name of Any Browns’ Quarterback
Cleveland, OH - Browns' all-pro offensive tackle Joe Thomas set a jaw-dropping NFL record Sunday when he surpassed 10,000 consecutive snaps without ever coming...
Nation Fondly Remembers When President Was Boring As Fuck
Washington D.C. - Hundreds of mourners gathered at the Capitol rotunda Tuesday to say goodbye to the last American President about whom no one...
White House Unveils Festive Christmas Cross
Washington D.C. - In a bold departure from Christmas tradition, the White House unveiled a festive burning lawn-cross as part of its Holiday decorations Tuesday. The...
Switching To Plant-Based Diet ‘Single Biggest Way’ We Can Save Earth’s Polluting Corporations From...
According to a new comprehensive analysis done by Yale University climate researchers, the single most impactful measure individuals can take to protect the planet's...
Nicolas Cage Marks Himself “Safe” During Hollywood Witch Hunt
Las Vegas, NV - Friends, family, and admirers of Hollywood mega-star Nicolas Cage were relieved Monday morning to receive a Facebook notification from the...
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Adorable! Millions of Wild Rats Gather To Fuck At Sizzler While...
Tacoma, WA - While most restaurants remain open for delivery or takeout, many states have now ordered-closed all buffet-style dining establishments as...
Retail Center Declares Marshalls Law
Maddison, WI - In an effort to protect retail workers from throngs of middle-aged women taking advantage of designer products at sensible...
‘Avatar’ Sequels Suspend Filming In New Zealand After Testing Negative For...
Christ Church, New Zealand - Filming of James Cameron's long-in-the-works Avatar sequels came to an abrupt halt Monday amid fears that no...
President Comforts Nation With Fireside Tweets
Palm Beach, FL - In an effort to calm an increasingly panicked nation, President Trump announced Thursday his plan to address his...
Endorsement: Mike Bloomberg Is The Only Candidate With The Integrity And...
We at Whiskeyleaks have worked hard to establish a reputation for integrity and truth-seeking in our hard-hitting journalism. We've always found it...
Pence Confident Coronavirus Reversible With The Right Therapy
Washington, D.C. — In the midst of nerve-racking reports that a global pandemic is inevitable, President Trump announced Wednesday that Vice President...