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Haiti Issues Travel Ban On All ‘Shithole Presidents’
Port-au-Prince, Haiti - Haitian President Jovenel Moise stunned the international community Friday with the issuance of an executive order barring the entry of any...
Unemployed Screenwriter Puts Finishing Touches On 6th Draft of Oscar Acceptance Speech
North Hollywood, CA - Resisting the urge to work on his two unfinished feature screenplays, unemployed writer Mark Patterson polished off a stellar re-write...
Study: Long Island Iced Tea Drinkers 3x More Likely To Have Bad Taste In...
Stanford, CA - A study published Friday by the Stanford School of Medicine revealed that people who drink Long Island Iced Teas are in...
Electronic Supergroup ‘Flying Flotus’ To Release Surprise Album
Los Angeles, CA - Experimental Electronic music fans around the world were thrilled this morning with the announcement that Supergroup FLYING FLOTUS will be...
Woman In Home Depot Looking Forward To Spending Extra 30 Minutes Nodding And Smiling...
Bucks, PA — After over a month of meticulous planning, 27-year-old Kimberley Sweetin excitedly entered Home Depot Wednesday evening to get the tools and...
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Adorable! Millions of Wild Rats Gather To Fuck At Sizzler While...
Tacoma, WA - While most restaurants remain open for delivery or takeout, many states have now ordered-closed all buffet-style dining establishments as...
Retail Center Declares Marshalls Law
Maddison, WI - In an effort to protect retail workers from throngs of middle-aged women taking advantage of designer products at sensible...
‘Avatar’ Sequels Suspend Filming In New Zealand After Testing Negative For...
Christ Church, New Zealand - Filming of James Cameron's long-in-the-works Avatar sequels came to an abrupt halt Monday amid fears that no...
President Comforts Nation With Fireside Tweets
Palm Beach, FL - In an effort to calm an increasingly panicked nation, President Trump announced Thursday his plan to address his...
Endorsement: Mike Bloomberg Is The Only Candidate With The Integrity And...
We at Whiskeyleaks have worked hard to establish a reputation for integrity and truth-seeking in our hard-hitting journalism. We've always found it...
Pence Confident Coronavirus Reversible With The Right Therapy
Washington, D.C. — In the midst of nerve-racking reports that a global pandemic is inevitable, President Trump announced Wednesday that Vice President...