Cherry Hill, NJ – Following a string of tough setbacks, 31-year-old Jessie Boyer moved back in with her parents Friday only to make a miraculous finding in her childhood bedroom: Her long lost Tamagotchi virtual pet, missing for some 18 years, pinned against the wall behind her headboard… STILL ALIVE!
“When I heard that faint beeping sound… I thought I was going crazy,” Boyer recalled. “When I moved the bed, saw Marvin’s faded skeletal body, and realized he wasn’t dead, I just started sobbing.”
After being dumped by her fiance two months ago and subsequently losing her job due to her inability to deal with the break up, Boyer’s astonishing reunion with a childhood friend gave her renewed sense of purpose. “If Marvin can survive 18 years in a small dark place with no help at all, then I know I can make it through this,” Boyer said through tears of happiness.
It wasn’t until Tamagotchi manufacturer Bandai America Inc. sent their own engineers to examine the ovate plastic creature that the young lady understood just how lucky she was to not have lost him. “When we heard it was somehow still kicking after 18 years, we had to meet the little guy… Just run a few quick tests and ask some questions,” retired Tamagotchi creator Aki Maita explained enthusiastically. “I was sure this would turn out to be a publicity stunt or a hoax related to our upcoming 20th anniversary. But I was dead wrong.”
Maita explained that the pixilated pocket pet had managed to survive, despite zero access to a preteen, by consuming its own poop emojis and sleeping 23 hours per day. Boyer admits to feeling a lot of guilt about neglecting her childhood pet and failing to hear its whiny beeps throughout her Smashing Pumpkins phase. “I’m just glad we’re together again, and I’m finally at a place where I can focus on its needs.”