Joe Thomas Admits He’s Never Learned The Name of Any Browns’...

Cleveland, OH - Browns' all-pro offensive tackle Joe Thomas set a jaw-dropping NFL record Sunday when he surpassed 10,000 consecutive snaps without ever coming...

Man Who Received Save-The-Date But Not Actual Invitation Unsure How To...

Lambertville, NJ - Local electrician Joseph Chapman was reportedly unsure how to proceed Tuesday as his friend's wedding, for which he received a save-the-date...

The New Yorker Sues Make-A-Wish Foundation Over Guarantee Andy Borowitz Had...

New York, NY - Attorneys for The New Yorker magazine filed suit Monday against Make-A-Wish Foundation, alleging the charitable organization falsely promised in 2012...

My Hair And Teeth Are Falling Out; Should I Be Worried?

Dear Whiskeyleaks, I’ve always had thick, lustrous hair and good teeth. But recently my hair and teeth have started falling out at an alarming rate....

Climate Scientist Cashes In On Global Warming Hoax By Landing Sweet...

Medford, MA - 33 year-old climatologist Dr. Edward Hinson shrewdly cashed in on the widespread global warming hoax by landing a cushy adjunct professorship...

Woman Stabs Boyfriend Who Called Her Crazy; Fails To See Irony

Huntington Beach, CA - 29 year old Tracy Robinson shocked friends and neighbors Thursday after allegedly stabbing her boyfriend Jake Reid 12 times for...